Update

Still sleepy and moody, but making some progress. Work went well the other day--baby holding is good therapy, as expected. Certain predictable hormonal shifts make moods more manageable, while deep conversation helps stabilize and minimize worry factors in certain areas. Tears are good cleansers and dreams are better processors than tantrums. ;)

Made contact with to professionals, who will, hopefully, prove helpful in addressing certain issues over both the short and long term. Have an interview with one tomorrow and a consultation with another on Thursday. Am also planning to join a "mailing party" on Wednesday and have plans with M., church people, and other doulas for the weekend. Having some sort of schedule should help with the moods and also with being motivated to use my time well when I am at home.

Am looking forward to the return of one of my friends to phone conversation range and hoping for a chance to converse with another friend via e-mail or phone in the near future. Had a short notice visit from a third friend on Friday. Was great to have some girl-time and to hear a different perspective on some things. Had good quality time with M. on Saturday and again today, and may be having more of that tomorrow, still trying to decide about that . . .

Hay in the Emotional Wiring.

Taxes on hold until 1 April due to complications that may result in less financial outlay. Emotions going haywire have kept me home, trying to cope. Have found some temporary help and am looking into longer-term solutions for underlying problem. Work later today. Should be good therapy, of a sort . . . At least it will take me "out of myself" for a while.

Am still intending to work on Spring Cleaning and creation of Web Site, but have been too sleepy and moody to do much . . .

Monday, Monday

Final day of taxes, I hope. Have now downloaded all relevant information. Can then begin on spring cleaning and website development.

The weekend was good. The weather was beautiful. Work was satisfying and one social engagement led to a one-time job for this week. More moula!

Easter Sunday included a flower communion at SKUUC, the church I used to attend, with M. Was really nice to see old friends and re-connect. Lunch was a bit difficult to find, as most places were closed for the holiday, but we found an open cafe with decent sandwiches. Then we went hiking up in the hills above Lake Chabot. It was clear enough, and we were high enough that we could see the City from the hills. M. got some pictures, but I didn't have my camera.

In the evening, we went to see Horton Hears a Who. It was a fun movie that stayed fairly true to Dr. Seus's book--even the animation reminded me of his art. :) So, all in all, a good weekend, and looking forward to a good week.

Country

I've been listening to a lot of Country music lately, due to a malfunctioning CD player. Am planning to remedy the malfunction with a new player as the old one is 6-8 years old and would probably cost more to fix that to replace. Will be keeping the old player for tape deck function.

But the Country music thing is rather new to me. I used to think I hated Country, but I'm coming to like it. Is it that the Country on the radio is more like pop, or that I'm living in a big, urban area, and the lyrics to some of the Country songs remind me of the "down home" small town values I grew up with? Or is it just that I never used to feel the need for a good cry, but now, when I do, Country is sure to trigger one? :) Whatever the reason, I did some cleansing crying this morning.

I also had a discussion with M. about one of our on-going topics. We have several on-going topics, and one of them was keeping me up last night, worrying, so I thought it was time for further discussion.

Had a small hitch in tax prep, but was able to solve it on-line this afternoon. I've slowed down a bit on my momentum with all that, but a day's worth of focused attention on Monday should bring it to conclusion.

Cough is much improved. Am looking forward to work and social engagements over the weekend. Will be out of the house and away from computers most probably until Monday afternoon. Will report then. :)

Knock, Knock

Who's there?
The Floor Guys. Its 8 am and we're here to redo your bathroom floor like we were supposed to yesterday, only we couldn't, so we told your manager (who didn't tell you, apparently). Oh, and by the way, we're going to be putting your toilet in the tub, so you won't be able to use it until we're done (but we're not going to actually tell you that--we're just going to do it).

Luckily, Walgreen's has a customer restroom and I used that before inputting a photo order. Actually, it's been a really productive day. I nearly finished my tax calculations last night, and got the final form I need on-line this morning. So I should be ready to put stuff in the mail tomorrow or Monday! Yay! (Actually, I enjoy playing with numbers, which is all doing taxes is, really, so that probably makes it easier for me to get done. Plus, I know what I'm doing now. The first couple years I did this, I had a huge learning curve.) Once everything is in the mail, I can move on to spring cleaning and professional web site development and trying to finish the requirements to get my DONA Certification.

Talked to M. last night and again this morning. I did quite a bit of phone calling this morning once the workmen finished, around 11:30. My cough is better, not gone, but better, and everything seems to be falling into place. Now I just need to rustle up some clients for April and May, and keep finding more as I go. Eventually, hopefully, I'll have enough work to make this, if not profitable, at least a viable way to support myself. Time will tell. I must persevere.

Tax Attack

I am attacking my taxes with a vengeance. I thought that the multiple jobs I worked this year might cause excessive confusion, but actually, things are moving along fairly quickly, thanks to WiFi at the library. I've got most of my book keeping in order, and It's only taken about 2 days of focused attention.

The funny bit was when I opened up a letter to discover that, according to them, I'm a man and married to myself. I went to the local IRS office today to clear up this issue, which is left over from changing my first name several years ago. :) It was just a matter of letting them photo copy some documents and signing a statement. Then I informed the nice tax guy a bit about what I do as a postpartum doula. All fun and good except the high price of downtown parking.

Oh, the other fun bit was that there were supposed to be workers in my apartment by 8 am today to fix my bathroom floor, but they didn't show. I "waited" for them until 1 pm, but then I had to go deal with taxes.

Enjoyed fresh air at a nice park with M. yesterday before Covenant Group. The playgrounds were really cool: they had neat play structures which were surrounded by a dry "lake" and had what looked to be water features. I'd like to go back in the summer and see if they turn on the water when it's warm. One of the playgrounds was meant to look like a pirate ship/dessert island. It was ringed with palms which were full of birds talking about the sunset.

Now moving on to water collection, TM, food, and *maybe* a bath or early bed or something nice like that. I got some homeopathics at the store yesterday, and my cough has improved. I have hope of being able to actually work on Sat, and can rest up more tomorrow and Fri, as I am not needed yet. :)

And Still Better

My cold continues to improve, although I am concerned that my cough may still be in evidence on Thurs. This could be a problem, as I am scheduled to look after a baby while his parents move house . . . I've been sleeping a lot, with hopes of speeding my recovery, but I may be adding homeopathic treatment, soon, as well.

Had a discussion about possible future fun adventures in the Bay Area. Ideas of stuff to "do" are suddenly plentiful--apparently all one has to do is put a little attention on looking. :)

Have some things to put in the mail and then plan to attempt to start on taxes once home, or at least by tomorrow. The weather is beautiful, I thoroughly enjoyed my walk to the lib. and am looking forward to the walk back home. :)

Frog-ish

I'm feeling better, but I sound like a frog--no Meet The Doulas for me. Weekend has gone well. Good conversations, good company, feeling more centered. (Had been going through a lot of personal inner termoil, hence the short posts--not much is appropriate for public media posting at the moment.)

Now I need to sign off and make a phone call to be sure that people who need to know that I won't be showing up know and have a little time to find a replacement speaker. Really had hoped to be well enough to give my talk today, but it can't be helped now . . .

Rather Coldly

I've got a bit of a cold. Feeling kind of icky, but not too bad. Am hoping some rest and good food will get me back on track, health-wise, as I have a lot of social and professional engagements this weekend. So with no further ado, I will sign off and get back home to do more along the lines of the rest part of the health equation. :)

Sleep is Good, Space is better

Sleep is so good that I didn't get up until afternoon yesterday and not until mid-morning today. I've been fairly productive, but I could do more if I wasn't sleeping so much.

Monday night, I asked M. for some space to sort some things out in my head and it's been really nice to just be with myself over the past couple of days. I feel a lot clearer now.

I've been thinking a lot about birth since the conference, especially unhindered/unassisted birth. I've linked to a lot of new sites in the list Unhindered Birth. Expect to see more, and some links to You Tube videos soon, as well.

I'm reading, and really enjoying, Laura Shanley's book Unassisted Childbirth. I got to meet her at the conference, along with Sarah Buckley, Rixa Freeze, Melissa Collins, Sheila Stubbs, and Dr. John. I also got to hear talks from Pamela Hines-Powel, Heather Cushman Dowdee AKA Hathor, and Michel Odent. I bought Unassisted Childbirth and Sarah Buckley's book, Gentle Birth, Gentle Mothering at the conference and had each signed by the author.

Now I'm off to try to do some more networking on Linked In.

Home Again, Home Again, Jiggity Jog

Conference was good. Got back this morning around quarter to 9. It was really nice to arrive and have the whole day ahead of me. Spent the morning and lunch with M. talking and stuff.

Am currently exhausted from way too little sleep, but not so emotionally drained as if I'd been at a birth. Actually, I'm feeling rejuvenated by the conference. I learned a lot and I have a lot running around in my head. I think I'll be adding some new links as I do more research on what I learned. I wish I could afford a real web site so I could explain why the links are there, instead of just posting lists of them . . .

Anyhoo, glad to be home. Have lots of plans for using time effectively over the next few weeks until I get another client. Annual Report and Taxes are at the top of that list. :) But right now, home and TM and sleep sound nice.

Off to Conference

with other students from my school (AAMI). No work scheduled for next week, which is a bit of a problem, as this conference is putting quite a strain on my wallet. Still, I plan to use the time productively for typing up notes and implementing ideas for growing my business.

Emotional explosion of the weekend solved through deep, sensitive conversation yesterday. Got put to bed after covenant group--very sweet. :)

Spent the day working and helping a friend. Came to the library "briefly" on my way home. Have been here 45 minutes so far. Really need to go home and meditate and eat and make a packing list and all that good stuff.

Look for more updates when this is all over, i.e., Monday or Tuesday of next week.

Life is Better . . .

for the moment. The issue that formed the center point weekend's emotional explosion looks less daunting today, for a number of reasons, good conversation and value-loading among them.

Am feeling lazy today, so really enjoyed the chance to hold a baby and read about maternal death in Mothering Mag. The article was recommended by someone on one of the many birth-related lists I subscribe to, and then low and behold, the current issue appears at my client's house this morning. Talk about support of nature. :)

Still enjoying connecting on Linked In. Debating whether to reconnect socially, or just use it professionally. Sticking with professional use at the moment, as don't have time to socialize via Internet.

Now headed home, after work to crash. Am in need of curling up with a good book-on-tape.

Exploding into Craziness

Personal space over weekend, intended to help sort through some emotional issues, ended up with things exploding yesterday afternoon/evening. In process of picking up the pieces in order to be coherent for an important conversation on Tuesday.

Still working on my Linked In profile. Added two contacts and got a recommendation from a client. Actually came to the library to look for a specific e-mail and stayed, well, longer than I planned.

Ought to be frantic about lack of preparation for upcoming conference, but am too preoccupied. Ought to go home and attempt to be productive--have laundry and vacuuming and dishes and cooking to do. Too much. Oh well. I'm used to rushing by now.