Gas Under Three

Today I actually saw a sign for gas that was under $3 per gallon! Stop the presses! This is a news worthy moment!

Well, not really, but nothing else that exciting has happened lately . . .

Life is still pretty good. I'm trying to figure out what measures and propositions to vote for. This state is either extremely political, or just has really bad laws, because the ballots are always flooded with local measures and statewide propositions. A few are clean cut, but most are really hard to decide on, because I either don't know enough about the issue to have an opinion, or the new law is vague and unclear enough that it's hard to know whether I actually support the proposed law or not. Ugh! Politics!

Back on Track

Things are so much better this week that I actually had the energy to get out to the library before work. I've been so productive and I'm excited about doing even more projects. Suddenly, I actually want to get that stuff that's been sitting in my "out-box" for over a year out of the house. And I want to work on my framing project (framing art from my collage days for my walls) and all sorts of other things.

The weather had finally turned cool and foggy. It's such a relief after a summer of nothing but blue sky. I have more energy for my work, and more energy for myself. Life is good. Except that I need to fill my ga$ tank again . . .

Kicking up Leaves

On my walk to the library today, there was this beautiful Maple Tree that had been dropping leaves all over and no one had raked them up, so I got to kick through them. It reminded me of "real" falls in the Midwest.

Finally got to read the answers to a question I e-mailed to the people who make the Flower Essences I work with. There was a long discourse on being an Empath. Had never heard of this before, but am very intrigued, particularly by the idea that some of the emotions I feel might not actually be mine. Hmm. Realized I had been carrying around someone else's depression and released it. Am feeling so much better.

Had a very specific plan of what to do today hear at the library, including leaving by a certain time (which is in 10 minutes). But got side-tracked by a "project" that involved a lot of browsing and day dreaming. So now am trying to cover the main points of the original plan in less than 10 min. Really will leave "on-time" today.

Too Busy

Life has been just too busy. I started a post last week, but I had my computer on battery and it cut out before I could finish.

Anyway, work has been hard. On the one hand, I'm glad to have a job; on the other, working in another family's home is quite challenging. Flower Essences are providing some of the support I need, but having support doesn't change the basic situation . . .

Went to a Dar Williams concert this week with my BF. It was fun to hear her live again. Unfortunately, I couldn't see very well, do to a large, standing room only crowd, but, hey, it's good she had a crowd, right? I'm still tripping over the guy who opened for her. I thought he must be some little known, or up-and-coming musician, but then, for his final song, he played something I first heard on the radio when I was at boarding school. I didn't pay much attention to radio back then, but there were a few songs I took note of and liked. This is one that still gets play on some stations. I'm pretty sure I've heard it recently. It totally blew my mind. Dar Williams has someone opening for her who gets mainstream radio play? Huh?

So anyway, life is up and down and up again. Right now I'm just glad to have some time at home ahead of me this weekend.

Painted Garden

So my church had this community service day today. I went out to a farm to volunteer, wore grubby clothes, ready to get dirty, brought brand new gardening gloves--bought for the adventure, and they asked us to paint! I wasn't exactly planning on ruining those clothes forever . . . Oh, well. They were old and the pants at least I never was going to wear for nice again as they were already stained, but the fleece pullover was in fine condition . . . I never did like to be too tidy with projects, though, so of course I got paint everywhere. It was inevitable. It even got in my hair.

The wonderful thing is how thoroughly I enjoyed myself. They're open for volunteers regularly, and I'm seriously considering going again. Now I even have dedicated clothes! I could have opted to work in the garden, but I wanted to be with the others from our group, and they were painting. So I went with them and enjoyed their company. Next time I go, I'll have to plan not to go to a Farmer's Market the day before, because they offered us free produce for volunteering. Unfortunately, my fridge was full . . . So much for not taking on anything new for a while. Then again, I haven't committed to anything . . . :)

Back in Ballance

It's really starting to feel like fall now. There's even wind and some colored leaves and the high was below 70 today. Can't complain about California, unless you're crazy like me and actually like winter and snow and all that . . .

Am acclimating to longer work hours much better than expected. A good deal of thanks is due to the people at Green Hope Farm for their fabulous flower essences and to my local Ortho-Bionomy practitioner. Have been in process for several weeks with parents, trying to re-define rolls, relationships, boundaries, etc. The whole experience produced quite a bit of upheaval--hence my non-specific blog posts--but seems to have come to a resolution. Had a huge emotional release during an O-B session on Wed, and am now feeling much more grounded and centered.

Am quite busy lately with church functions. Amazingly, I have so far had the energy to juggle it all. :) But it has been somewhat stressful, and therefore might be nice to avoid taking on anything more for a few weeks . . .

Finished the NVC book, and am continuing to use and enjoy the process. Am really enjoying the resultant insights into self and also am more able to imagine what others might be feeling/needing. There really does seem to be a point when the focus shifts from, "What do/did they think of me?" to, "What are/did they feel/need," that makes a difference in my perception of the situation and in my feeling towards whoever I'm dealing with. Unfortunately, it often takes half-an-hour or more of quiet thought and space from the stressful situation to actually get to that new place, but at least I'm getting there. Hopefully, with practice, it will become more spontaneous and less time-consuming.

Country in Distress

There is this house near where I work that flies an American flag. Well, actually there are several houses that do that, but the one I'm talking about is unique. I first noticed it because the flag was not only faded and old, but also upside down. I had recently read a book in which the characters used an upside down flag as a universal distress signal. I thought the people must be thumbing their noses at our country. It seemed to me to be a mixture of rebellion and disrespect. But then, a couple weeks ago, I noticed that they had put up a new flag, but it was still upside down. That led me to change my opinion and think that the folks in that house must be patriotic about America, but very concerned about our current government. I guess that's pretty much how I feel, too.

Dar Williams said it best in her song, Anthem: "I am an American./From the fourth grade turkey pageant to the protest march I stand./I am an American./I know there's blood in the pavement and we've turned the fields to sand./Hey I know where I come from, but I have a question,/Shall we the people never come home?/For after all that we've been are the dreams to come after. "